1. |
Lucifer
06:25
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Everything that’s up is looking down
Upon me, the fallen angel, cursed unto the ground
For stealing the crown
God sent His justice, now I wait to drown
The jealousy inside me burnt worse
Than the gaping mouth of Hell or any of Dante’s verse
As a snake, I coerced
Joy into darkness; let sin run its course
These demons, they haunt more than just you,
But even me, their keeper, locked within this tomb
Of a world set askew:
The ghosts of angel brothers now haunting empty pews
I helped nail your Savior on that cross,
Craving the final word, simply put me at a greater loss
I once read that Christ learned the cost;
Obedience through suffering--but hell, I could never bear the loss
And I love you like the crown I cannot keep;
Like the kingdom I’m locked out from, which brings me to weep
And bitterly gnash my teeth
Now sackcloth and ashes, praying for some relief.
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2. |
A Byword
04:59
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Everything silent
went out with the rain
as I leaned over the past
Now, the present sounds violent,
wrestling in
through the window again.
I felt sorry
to have ever convinced
such a heartache as you
to make, in this past-tense heart,
a trembling cave
you had no place to be,
with nothing to do or to see.
Lord, I could count
all the thin-ribboned rain
--I left up the window
and froze all the same
While I was a byword
for bedridden shame
I saw the future maimed,
bent like a wick to a flame.
God felt sorry
to have ever released
the cold crow in me
to feed on a carrion-love;
to sit ‘neath the sill
and see out the sun
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3. |
Wolves
03:38
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I was raised up young beside the wolves
Of my home, of my home
Where his father made their living violently
In blood and stone, blood and stone
The trees shot high and grew so close
There we’d play, there we’d play
But I’m a runaway; you’re a fraud, a fake, a liar
We’ve grown away, we’ve grown away
The woods are calling out my name
So I’m howling up at the moon,
“My friend, my savior, my broken neighbor
Come home, come home…”
Now they’ve come barking after me up to my door
I’d dare begin to face my sin
And like the moon hanging stripped above the trees
I’m cut thin, oh, I’m cut thin
But there’s no baring teeth or raging words
Just broken eyes, those burnt-red eyes
My heart is not what it used to be; I feel spent when I’m reduced to thee
My friend, we’ve met our end
The wolves are calling out my name
So I’m rustling away from the moon
All my days, my labor, stretched long with misbehavior
Now I’m gone, now I’m gone.
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4. |
When I Heard You Died
02:55
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When I heard you died I stalled by the stairs,
One hand on the railing, with a thought and a prayer
And I answered back “Oh,” before I leaped up the stairs
Uncaring, unknowing, like the new winter air
Then that night she left. But my thoughts crowded to you:
Your old, crippled legs pumping the organ flue
The sound was not always pleasant; you’d stumble and make do
While the church choir sang on, with a smile to ensue
I wept and cried for the sweet imperfections
And the wind cried, too, marked with cold reflection
For her, her hands, her hair flying each direction,
Her soft, little voice when hard-pressed for introspection.
So, what I say: Don’t say. How I stand: Don’t stand--
I’m not asking politely, I’m making demands
For her and for you, for nothing goes as planned
When I say don’t go, please take my hand
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5. |
On the Road to Emmaus
04:42
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A walk to Emmaus in the spring:
All seven miles, as your ghost, to you, I cling
I had been laid to rest three months past,
And now you see my ghost as I walk beside your tracks
But you barely recognize this face,
I’m like a stranger in this town; a prophet without a base;
Or just another forgotten crime,
but when I close my eyes I can still see yours pressed up to mine
And my hands, left to idle, trace a mold of your back.
I recall every hill and fold; the shifting and the slack;
The brightness and the blurring; the glory and the shame
Now, set me homeward
Wasn’t your heart still burning inside
When you rolled away the stone and left the door swung wide?
But all the glory bled out
From every wound I marred and every ghost I hung around
This is not the road to Damascus; not bright grace burnt through;
Not a vivid revelation; nor a promise that I’ll be new
Your face turned shyly while your eyes shone with warmth,
“Yes, but that's the beauty of it,”
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6. |
My Brother, My Keeper
05:07
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In the Garden we burned the effigy
for all our lost days, our careless rivalries
The ashes crumbled, the earth cried out loud
before the rain washed the blank skies to the ground
“The Wind will take it away,” you said
But oh, my brother, my keeper, you’ve read
the book of beginnings, seen these people getting hurt
Sin lies at the door, your brother’s blood combs the dirt
But, there’s one thing that I’ll see
When you rise up against me;
although, I have no speed
the Mighty Wind will fight for me.
Your words like knives and my thoughts bled and torn
In that field where your hate was bred and born
The bread of angels falling now, so slow,
Buries me like the cold, white peace of snow
So I restored that which I did not steal
Before you crawled on your chest to bruise my heel
Cursed is the ground for your sake, all your days!
May the thorns and the thistles, now, become your maze
But there’s one thing that I’ll see
after you’ve turned to conquer me;
after I’ve seen the widowed tree
where the fruit and branches plea. . .
. . .You, a fugitive; you, running from the wind;
Your back turned, fleeing, a price on your skin
Oh, my brother, my keeper, you’ve fled
I’m as good to you now as I am dead.
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7. |
Zion
04:09
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Zion, take me home
There’s no good here
Zion, take me back
For what other sounds exist without her laugh?
Zion, shine the moon
Let me know if it’s gone for good, and if so, take me soon
In a chariot of flame,
or a whirlwind;
whatever is Your aim
Zion, I’ve marched on
I’ve heard the sound of my footsteps; I know there will be no dawn
Zion, I have no shame
For when I grow old I still want to know to say her name;
To sound every syllable
With love and fear,
And with these, full
Take me home,
For the house gets so quiet, lying here, all alone
Zion, these are my crimes
But, I am back now. I am better than sometimes.
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8. |
From Glory
05:07
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The Old Man’s been locked up in lighthouse,
A figure through the sill;
His notebooks, full, about the desk
Reveal a statue, a portrait of goodwill:
“I was taught not to speak,
But to listen and see.
For when the moon calls the tide,
And the sea makes reply,
I am a guide for each
Lost soul out at sea.
“I’d like nothing but to stay
To comfort each creak in the night.
But, Glory, you’re on your last light;
The moon is but a cold sight;
My heart was all but forthright--
Oh, burn on through sleep!
And sing as I go,
Though you’ll be boarded and closed;
Though the ships find their home
Without a flame or a soul!
I’ve been locked up in the lighthouse
to decorate the past
“Everything’s bartered,
They’re sellin’ me off!
They’re taking all I own
With a wink and a scoff
Glory’s on fire, she’s
Rust-red in the light,
Setting like autumn
When the sun comes rising in spite
“Eveything’s shattered,
From the glass to the sea,
I’m plywood and nails
Just to foster a dream;
Conjuring ghosts
Ain’t the same as it’s been
Look at me leaving
And know I’ll be back again,”
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9. |
Into the Sea
02:19
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I’ll make my home in the sea
To catch all my dreams
When they’ve caught up with me
Boarding this house up
I’m cutting my hands;
Enduring too much,
I’m too weathered a man
Glory, she’s gone out for good;
Her golden light faded
I’d still miss her, if I could
But I can’t bear the sight
--I might build me a boat,
Just go floating away,
Cross the bar, afloat
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10. |
Forgetting
05:30
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I saw my old home
Flamed with light
But, there was a devil-man
Come to rip at my sight
He haunted my side
And I quivered in fright
‘Til I broke from the dream
And awoke in the night
To the sea
All things remembered,
Considered in mind
I carry with me,
All boxed-up and twined
But, Lord knows, I'm aching
For a just sliver of time
When I can lay it all down
And leave Glory behind;
Leave the casket of photographs,
Bent, grayed, and riven;
Leave the pendants and sea-glass;
Leave all things forgiven
“Don’t make me mean,”
I prayed from the bow,
“Don’t make me fight it
For the chains will come down,
I don’t want to be mean,
I don’t want to be lonely,”
A warmth crept in quietly
As the tears gave out slowly
“Don’t make me mean,
And don’t let me die,”
I raised up my fist,
But the wind cut my pride
So, I held up that box
And my hands let go slowly
“Don’t let me be mean,”
As I threw it all in
To the sea
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